Voices: Unwedded Bliss
It's one of the most frequently asked questions of the fresh divorcee: "Would you ever get married again?"
A couple weeks ago, there were too many factors to consider before answering such a question. But now, thanks to Bush and the Pope, the issue has become considerably clearer. I still don't know what political and religious conservatives fear they will lose if homosexual couples earn the right to legally marry (though I suspect it's a form of power).
But I do know that I want absolutely nothing to do with their exclusive little social club. The idea sickens me as much as our president's disregard for the supposed separation between church and state. Thanks for the choice, but until you give it to everyone regardless of sexual preference, no thanks. I'll find an alternative just like they have to do.
Hey, if enough of us opt for the alternative, we can have our own little social club. It could happen. Consider the case of the metrosexual. You thought it was confusing to be gay these days - this poor guy woke a few months ago to find a big fat label on his forehead and advertising campaigns tightly focused on his wallet. If you somehow missed the discovery of this honorary social club, relax. It took me awhile to catch on, too - there's just not a whole lot of the species running around Northeast Pennsylvania.
Mark Simpson, the British author credited with coining term in 1994, has described a metrosexual as "a young man with money to spend, living in or within easy reach of a metropolis - because that's where all the best shops, clubs, gyms, and hairdressers are. He might be officially gay, straight or bisexual, but this is utterly immaterial because he has taken himself as his own love object and pleasure as his sexual preference."
Just in time - the metrosexual cover has risen to protect men who want to express a traditionally feminine vanity without making an issue of their sexual preference. The Supreme Court has made it perfectly clear that what goes on in the bedroom is none of anyone's business (nah na nah na nah na). Now, no one needs to assume that just because you look gay that you are, in fact, actually gay.
The so-called gay television revolution is supposed to be helping straight America become comfortable with and perhaps even find value in homosexuals. But anyone who actually knows gay people understands that what America is really becoming comfortable with is a market-friendly stereotype.
Honestly, I worry a little about NASCAR dad (another honorary social club). He's bound to be disappointed when he meets a less than stylish and not particularly witty or entertaining, real, gay man. Imagine his confusion when he then turns to shake hands with a womanizing metrosexual. Oh, well. He'll get over it. Maybe even learn that it's O.K. (as in socially acceptable) to embrace his feminine side.
It's really a trend long overdue to return. Men have been stifled since the decay of "the dandy." Let the metrosexuals of the world conspire to set them free. And anything that allows people the right to remain ambiguous is a good thing in my book. Screw Mars and Venus already. You can be from Jupiter or Saturn or Neptune or even Uranus if you want. It's your choice.
Bush and Co. may accept your appearance while denying your reality. They may try to create new laws establishing their rigid belief systems as our current social paradigm. But it won't last long. America may be learning to appreciate differences via target markets, honorary social clubs and stereotypes, but she is genuinely learning. And the more comfortable we are with those who are consciously choosing to exercise their personal freedoms, they more we become comfortable with making the choice to exercise our own.
Imagine it. An America full of people thinking and feeling and expressing themselves without fear of persecution. Maybe that is something Bush should fear.
--alicia grega-pikul, 14 August 2003
