Voices: Of Delusion and Crusades
Pastafarianism is barely four months old but you’ve probably already heard of the Flying Spaghetti Monster even if you haven’t personally been touched by “his noodly appendage.” In perhaps the sanest response yet to the nation’s intelligent design debate, Bobby Henderson demanded that if ID is allowed into the classroom, FSM must get equal time (see venganza.org).
As a Pennsylvanian, and perhaps more importantly as an agnostic, I’ve been holding my breath in anticipation of the results of the ongoing “Dover Panda Trial.” The case should easily be won by the plaintiffs — parents who insist the Dover School Board’s required alternative to evolution statement is a violation of the separation of church and state. The statement specifically and solely recommends the intelligent design resource Of Pandas and People to those students interested in alternative theories.
Book publisher The Foundation for Thought and Ethics has removed overt religious references from its organizational mission and its ID textbook — the second edition literally replaced “creationism” with “intelligent design”— for fear book sales might suffer. Translation: the better to brainwash you with, my dear. The FTE’s articles of incorporation state the organization’s primary purpose as one of religious education — specifically “making known the Christian gospel and understanding of the Bible and the light it sheds on the academic and social issues of our day.”
The case should be easily won by the plaintiffs. Referring students to an article of religious propaganda is an obvious violation. But the Dover Panda Trial decision will not be made by a jury. It will be made by one man — Judge John E. Jones III, appointed in 2002 by President George W. Bush a.k.a. the man appointed by the intelligent designer himself to lead the Christian crusade.
The Dover school district’s star witness of the week, biochemistry professor Michael Behe, pointed to students’ misconception of evolution as fact. Last I knew scientists were pretty open about Darwin’s THEORY of Evolution being a THEORY. Students who get to ninth grade without understanding what does and does not constitute a theory are evidence of a lousy educational system. They don’t need to be referred to Of Pandas and People; they need to take a few courses in critical thinking.
The primary purpose of science is the acquisition of knowledge. There’s no hidden agenda. Science never claimed to have all the answers. The whole idea has been to acquaint students with the knowledge we’ve amassed and to present them with the current prevailing theories so they can grow up to fill in the blanks. Science — unlike most religions — doesn’t hesitate to admit when it’s wrong. Astronomers weren’t embarrassed by the recent discovery that stars were born inside a black hole, previously thought only to consume. They were excited and couldn’t wait to tell everyone.
But then the Dover Panda Trial isn’t about education. Nor is it about training our children to think. It’s about politics and that’s not a theory, it’s a fact as plain as the eyeliner on Harriet Miers’ face. It’s about the Dover School Board trying to push its shared personal agenda in the backdoor. It’s about the crusade to save the children of the morally weak. The leaders of the FTE not only believe that the scientific curriculum is “hostile” to Christianity but also that public education undermines moral values. Two of them wrote in 1983, that “the current deplorable condition of our schools results in large part from denying the dignity of man created in God’s image.”
Conversely, for all the debate about Darwin’s theory, he can’t be accused of pushing a personal or political agenda. A self-proclaimed agnostic, the scientist personally believed that “the mystery of the beginning of all things is insoluble by us.”
We may never know if the panda’s sixth finger (sometimes called a thumb though it’s not opposable like ours) was put in place by a Christian god or by evolution and natural selection or by the Flying Spaghetti Monster. Our lack of knowledge is less important than what we do know — that the “thumb” just so happens to be the perfect tool for processing bamboo which just so happens to be the surprising sole source of food for these unlikely vegetarians. Our schools need to focus on passing that knowledge on to kids and inspiring them to learn more.
-- alicia grega-pikul, 20 October 2005.
Send email to: apikul@timesshamrock.com.
